Social Skills: C-

I have never been very good at your average insignificant mingling. In fact, I am usually anxious and awkward and have a difficult time hearing and remembering names or details of any given conversation with a stranger. Of course, after partaking of a ripe old grape or two, I am ready to exchange phone numbers and other intimate details. This weekend myself and a friend traveled to Agua Dulce, a small town even further up the 14 freeway than the big CC, for a baby shower. Now usually I would turn down the invite, not being close friends with the mom to be, but since my girlfriend was going and I was curious about the large ranch style home that the shower was being held in, I said yes.

I fished out from my closet sandals, with heels, mind you, jeans that were too tight and a black shirt that I hadn't worn for at least a month. With a stroke of mascara I was headed out the door in no time at all. When we arrived, the house was as large as I had imagined it would be, with horses and stables and arenas and cows and a pool, as you can see the list goes on and on. Upon entering, I immediately realized that I knew absolutely no one at all, so I found a perfect spot on one of the couches in the corner and planted myself down on the large cowhide that draped the sofa. I admired the belt buckles that adorned the entertainment center and numerous horse statues, but especially the large cowboy that passed by me on his way out for a beer.

After a prayer lunch was served. I dined on the only leaves that I could find without meat and a diet coke. I once again congratulated the mom to be, played some intense shower games and made my way out to the porch. I sat with the 16 year-old large dog, who I truly appreciated. Not only was she 16, but she was pleasantly plump with a thick mop of hair. It was hot and she panted and ate potato chips as they dropped in front of her. I pictured Olivia swimming in the large fountain in the courtyard and enjoyed my banana nut cake. After 2 hours, it was time to say goodbye, and once again I attempted to head down the long path of uneven wooden steps that led me to my car. I am certain I could have made a better attempt to engage others in conversation, but I suppose some things are better left unsaid.